safe haven

slow and sick

it has been 8 days since i've had this undefined cough and congestion. i'm definitely over being sick. i've been a mess this week; it's difficult for me to stay focused and on schedule with anything when i don't feel well. i am such a baby when i am sick. i want to be coddled, i want to be held. in my nature, i have a tendency to be the one caring for others, meeting needs and what not. but the tables turn when i am sick. i'm not sick very often; it's a surprise to me that i've been sick for this long. it's frustrating, in fact. there is so much that needs to be done. so many assignments due next week. yet i remain unrested and forced to slow the rhythm of my life down.

every night i will attempt to lay down to sleep. it only takes a few minutes until i'm hacking up slimy obscenities and feeling miserable. most mornings i somehow make it down from my loft bed without breaking my neck, i use the restroom, and i will sit on the couch and fall asleep sitting straight up. it helps that i've been getting up when it is still dark out - not because i want to, but because my body prompts it.

this morning was no different. i climbed down, used the restroom, sat on the couch, fell asleep. but somewhere in between sitting and climbing back into my loft, i remember someone whispering in my ear, "miriam, i want to pray for you." it was my roommate, amy. with one hand below my neck and the other on my back, she began to speak healing and life over my sick body. i have no clue what she prayed; i blame the huge dose of nyquill that i took last night (i still feel slightly drunk and incoherant). but i think about the culture of our apartment, and i can't help but smile. it's a culture of prayer and encouragement, love and grace, and a lot of laughter. there are ten of us total living in this single-floor, 5 bedroom, 2 bath beauty. it sounds cliche, but we are a family. i feel well taken care of here. it goes beyond someone bring me juice or putting an extra blanket on me when i'm sick. there are nights when caitie and i will pray over each other until one or both of us just falls asleep. it's a great way to go, try it sometime. don't get me wrong; there are times when i wished my roommates would all just go away and i could live on my own. and i know that i would absolutely love having my own bathroom and kitchen. yet i know that in the end, i would hate living by myself no matter how clean my place would be. it is freeing to have such confidence that you are not alone.

Labels: love, sickness, stillness

posted by miriam @ 11:15 AM